March 10, 2008

  • So some of you wonder what the point of the FRIENDS is…

    Well I’ll tell ya.

    On the left side of my page I have a widget showing all of my friends… these are people that I enjoy reading and communicating with… They are the people I find FUNNY, ENTERTAINING, and THOUGHT PROVOKING…

    YOU GUYS…

    The difference that I see between this and My Space friends is that there is a chance to know each other here.

    Doesn’t it figure that if I like you, that someone who likes ME will like you?!

    Look at it as advertising for your site…

    HOWEVER I don’t like it when people ask to be my friend and don’t sub to me… it means they have no intention of reading my posts or getting to know me. Where is the friendship in that?

    Maybe we don’t use the friends widget enough? For today I think I well go and try to visit some of my friends friends…  Who knows who I’ll meet!

    OH also… it isn’t a numbers game… the longer you are on Xanga the more people you tend to “collect” . People use Xanga  as needed… which is as it should be. Sometimes they post daily and other times it will be months… Just because someone becomes busy with real life doesn’t mean I am ditching them as a friend… I watch carefully for their occasional post and say hello when I can, always happy to hear from them …

    COMMENTS… People say comments equal love… I think foot prints mean love… I mean after all, sometimes there just isn’t anything to say.

    What do you all think?

    Does it bother you when people don’t leave comments?

    Do you use the FRIENDS module on peoples sites?

     

     

Comments (58)

  • I get to be the first friends to send my love!

    Have a great day

  • It used to bother me when I would see the footprints and no one left me a comment, but it doesn’t anymore.  Just like you said, sometimes my post may not spark conversation in a person.  I sometimes see the footprints and I hop over a take a peek to see who it is…sometimes I say hello or comment.  Guess I felt like I was ringing their doorbell and then running away if I didn’t leave a comment.  

    I would like to know how to skim my list of friends.  I have people as friends who NEVER come over to my site.  All it says to do is BLOCK them…but I find that would be rather rude.    I would rather delete them …you know…unknowingly. 

  • i don’t care if people leave comments.  i just don’t like it when someone reads a ton of my blog and they don’t even have one entry on theirs. i totally blog block these punks.

  • I’m on lock down, so you have to be a friend to be able to read me.  There are reasons for that but it’s not because I’m interested in having more friends than anyone else.  In fact, I go thru and clean out the ones that don’t come by or comment at all after requesting my friendship.  If they really do read me and just don’t come by, then they ususally ask to refriend.

  • Sometimes, people are just passing through,  I write despite who may or may not come!  How does one put up a friend’s module, do you need to use themes?!

  • I enjoy getting comments only because I love the social interaction. I get way more footprints than I do comments. Probably because I’m an acquired taste. I know that I don’t get the comments that I used to because so many of my subscribers haven’t been around Xanga in ages. Sad really…because there were so many good writers that have just vanished.  

  • I will blog no matter how many footprints I get on my Xanga,   and not matter how many comments I get I will still be blogging.

    As for blocking,  I really hate blocking people (all the people I have blocked,  has had their Xanga shut down.)

  • I don’t mind if people leave comments. I love getting them, but it’s not nessesary. Mainly I like to find out what my xanga friends thing, that’s mainly why I post what I post. I sometimes use the friends module. I also use thier sub list or visit the people that have commented on thier posts. Then I surf through folks for a while commenting or not commenting whatever strikes my fancy till I get lost and have to go back to my site and start over.

  • I never notice friends.  If a person visits and doesn’t leave a comment, I’ll comment them once and if they don’t respond, I’ll forget they exist.  I don’t mind if they read, but not going to hang on.

  • I try to make it around to all I sub to  but like you said, sometimesthere’s nothing to say.

  • You are such a sweet considerate person! And funny with that. I try to comment when I have something to say. Same for entries. Sometimes I don’t blog for a long time and miss it. I love receiving comments they show reaction and may give an other point of view. 

  • As you say sometimes it can be quite hard sometimes to post a comment.

  • Sometimes it is hard.  And I appreciate that you still love me, even though I’m terrible at posting on a regular basis!

    In regards to commenting…By the time I read your post, there’s like 20 comments on it already and someone has usually said whatever I would have said and they’ve done it in a much more witty way.  So from now on, I’m leaving only random, weird comments on your page.  Here’s your first:

    I like cereal that looks like dog biscuits.

    Have a great day!

  • ya know what?  i feel blessed to call you a friend.. even if it is only here in xangaland!  <<>> 

    i wouldn’t say it bothers me really when folks just lurk and don’t comment, but i will say that i just dont get it.  i mean, if you are gonna take the time to drop by a site, at least take a sec and say hello…..

  • many times that is how I find new people, is going through the friend widget. myspace always has an agenda of popularity. Xanga is about being recognized for your artistic talent, not how your c-cups look in the obligatory mirror picture.

  • Hell Fire Ang I can’t believe I’m not on your friends list  I will remedy that here and now…. really it doesn’t bother me if people don’t comment and I don’t have friends lock (or what ever)  so sometimes I wonder about the people who visit and don’t comment especially the ones from like Russia or Hong Kong….but it doesn’t bother me…… curious minds want to know is all ……ilym

  • Comments may not equal love, but they show that someone has read the blog and would like to share their thoughts (which is always welcomed) with the author of that blog.

    And I agree with you. It bothers me when people request to be “friends” but don’t bother to subscribe. Sometimes I feel compelled to be “nice” and “friend” them, other times I ignore them.

    Thanks for the free advertisement.

  • i’m always just thrilled to hear from people :)

  • Oh, I do NOT like lurkers; but it’s different when someone I KNOW has visited my site and not left comments. Given my past experience with less-than-ethical people on Xanga (and in real-life); I’m a bit prickly about having strangers come peek at my site and not at least say hello. To me, it’s the online equivalent of staring someone down on the street then walking away without saying a word. You wonder… “WTH was THAT about!?” When friends, subs, and other folks I know come by and don’t leave a comment; it doesn’t really bother me at all. I’m glad they stopped by, because we already had interactions before.

    I agree with LolaLaurenATL–sometimes there’s nothing more to say or it’s already been said. But, I avoid that whole problem by not reading your previous commenters before I leave mine! It’s not MY fault that you have so many regular readers or that sometimes someone gets has the same thought as me. We should simply pray for that person, because obviously they have a sick & twisted mind just like me! LOL!

  • I don’t think anyone needs to comment on every post, but I do wish they would comment once in a while. I have a few lurkers and it’s a little creepy.

    Sometimes I get friended and forget to subscribe. Usually I’m getting around to subbing them though.

    I don’t use the friends module though. I’m very active about posting and very active about commenting on the dozen or so sites I read very regularly and that I like a lot, but I’m pretty lame about meeting new people. It’s too hard for me to keep up with more than a few dozen so I don’t even try.

  • I don’t get the ‘collecting’ friends thing. I’ll friend you if you sub to me and comment. I’ve had people who have never been by my site before, try to friend me the first time they stop by but they don’t sub. I don’t get that either.  I also have a lot of people subbed to me who have never left a comment, ever. If they have nothing to say about my posts in two years, why are they subbed to me? But I don’t let myself get worked up about it. It takes all kinds to make the world go ’round. 

    @LifeNeedsProtection - You can go to your friends list and delete them as a friend without blocking them.

  • Cool post… I do feel better when someone does comment on my post, but I’ll live when someone doesn’t.  I really haven’t given much thought to the friends function, though I have made a few friends here.

  • I haven’t given much thought to the friends thing. I always comment on people’s site, if only just to say hi.

  • I have people that say they have read me for a few years and then will suddenly leave their first comment.  That doesn’t bother me.

  • I really don’t mind if they comment or not-like someone said, the post itself may not spark interest or conversation (my feelings are not hurt) and it’s also possible someone doesn’t have a lot of time and cruises by to see what’s up and get back to me later-or not. I don’t mind. Sometimes if I can’t sleep I cruise around late at night, but rarely comment..it would take too much effort.

    There are a number of people I have on my friends list I don’t subscribe to, mostly because I just forgot about it-or they asked me and I accepted and didn’t think about the subscription thingy. sometimes I’m just on auto-pilot.Then there are a few-like dan’s place-that there are so many comments on a subject and many of them say the same thing I’m thinking, I don’t bother.There are some I do consider good friends and I feel it would be rude to not say hello tho unless I know I can get back.hello 

  • I am a total comment whore, so beward, don’t just lurk if you wanna stay in the “party”

  • my insecurity screams when someone drops by and doesn’t message. It’s a bit like “Oh she is sooooooooooooo boring I can’t say anything”

    BUT, I also understand cause I’ve done it from time to time (and haven’t thought oh boring, I just couldnt think of anything to say)

    As for Friends, I never used that feature but I am always happy when someone invites me to be their friend.

    THANK YOU ANG!!

  • I am happy if someone notices me. I don’t get on Xanga every day, but I get my subs sent to my email, so I can keep up even if I don’t have time to get around. Xanga is fun. Not something to get upset about

  • Ditto!  Me…Friend…You…Friend!  Lurk! Lurk!  

  • I really like reading what my friends and non-friend subscribers think, so I like getting comments. I leave a comment on just about every blog I read, I feel like if you took the trouble to write it and put it out there to share, I’m going to at least say a line or two.   

    I know that some people don’t do the friend thing for their own reasons,  If I “know” you and you want to be my friend that’s ok, some people just have different ideas about it all. As for footprints I mostly ignore those.

  • About the footprints equaling love…..although I have not been commenting because I have not been in a decent mood to comment lately, I do still read/keep up with xanga friends through the digest which I check through my e-mail.  Although you may not see my footprint, I am still here reading.  :)   Things seem to be going ok in my life and I am in a better mood so I want to start visiting everyone’s page and comment…..starting with you!  :)

    Congrats on Is’ letter for testing.  It is a wonderful opportunity for her.  Her friend’s comment makes me smile….he was just scared, that’s all.  I hope Is fully understands that her friend can visit her often so she can focus on doing a great job on the test.  Good luck!!!!

    Later,

    Gina

  • None of it bothers me really. It makes no difference to me. I have my favourites (you being on of them) who are always in my mind and heart, and they are my true friends – whether they’re added as a friend or a sub or not!

  • I do not mind if people read and do not post comments.  I am definately at fault, for reading sites and not commenting all the time.  Most of the reason being is time restriction.  I will read posts while on lunch at work or at break, but have no time to post comments, then get home and my computer stinks so I do not get to post much.

    I have met new friends and found new sites from the sites I subscribe/friend with.  Thats how you meet alot of great people.

  • i said this before on someone else’s site… i think its not necessary to comment EVERY time, but to visit and never comment is kinda creepy- peeping toms if you will…

  • Did I forget to leave a comment again?

    Are we friends still? Am I subscribed to you?

    Goodness I can’t keep track of all those things?

    Where is Donkey? He can answer these questions for me. He’s a smart a$$.

  • I really liked what you had to say and the points you made.  I often like to read, but feel I don’t really have anything going on to post.  I esp like the point that a footprint is love….shows I care even if I don’t leave a note.  At this point in my life, I have a lot of time to kill waiting for the phone to ring indicating someone wants to see the house…but when we sell and I have to start packing and moving….I can only hope I have time to breathe!!!! 

  • I know some get really put off when people read their subs and don’t comment, but I do get this. Some days all you can do is check quick and then its off. I do try to post something often, it give me the chance to get to know someone on a more personal level. Footprints are a good way to know that you have had people cruising on your ”street” even if they cannot come in for a visit!!! 

  • Okay, here is my deal. I hate it when people bitch that I don’t leave comments. I sub to people because I like what they put out there, I like what they say. Doesn’t mean that I have a comment about it. I blog for myself. If someone comments —bonus. If you are blogging for the comments factor that is your deal…I think that you hit the nail on the head…footprints…that is the where it is at. Now I have my blog locked down…but it is more for who I want to let in to see inside my head. I don’t feel pressure to blog nor would I let anyone pressure me…

    I guess it depends why you blog. Like everything else I am selfish, so I do it for myself. Sure I like to have a comment but I am not hurt if people do or don’t. Although you are required by blood to comment everytime. Meanwhile, I don’t have to comment on yours since I have been pulling the bratty little sister bit off perfectly for years and it has worked very well for me.

  • @Random1974 - well that bratty little sister thing… and you know sometimes I don’t want to hear what you have to say! lol

  • I likey footprints…sometimes I don’t want to leave a dumb-o comment just to leave one you know?  If I’m really touched by an entry what could I possibly say that would fit?  Sometimes it’s better to say nothing at all.

  • I already told you I hate it when people stop by and don’t leave comments. :)   I don’t take on many new friends, because I only have a limited time on the computer, and I would hate to be friends with someone whose site I don’t read.

  • I like to see comments, so that I know what people are thinking.  But many of my blogs are intended as much to be a personal diary as a call for comments.  With the new subscription features in xanga, you’re not even guaranteed to get footprints from readers .  . .

  • Much love from me, ang.

  • I do look at the friends module and find myself clicking away. It’s an interesting way to find new stuff to read.

  • Footprints are nice.  Most of time they’re just a really good way to find new sites to read.  I try to comment often, but sometimes what I want to say has already been said and worded better than I would’ve put it.  I haven’t gotten used to sub-ing and friend-ing yet, although I end up coming back to the same sites time after time.

  • it makes me curious when people leave footprints but don’t say anything…. like: who is this person, and where did they find MY blog? I dunno. Ever since I changed my preferences to only allow people w/ Xanga accounts to read my page it’s like almost no one does, but people I didn’t know read it read it, which was kind surprising.

    I don’t really look at the friends thing because 1) most people’s sites are ugly and hard to read and 2) the blogs I DO read regularly are read in my subscriptions, not their native blogs.But I feel like I inspired a topic! :D

  • I’m still using the old classic xanga rather than themes so I can’t add the friends module. I add friends to people I want to read ‘friends lock’ and also people I have come to know who’ve been my subs for ages.

    I love getting comments personally. Sometimes I don’t do a new entry until I’ve got a sasifactory amount of comments! I’m not just in it for the comments though. I consider myself a bit of a xanga addict so I get a high when I get comments! It’s the truth even if it sounds bad!

    -Heidi

  • awwww but im just here for your cute kids…..have i mentioned the photos u got of them OMG cute…nah im kiding its not like i want a baby or watever…ur blogs are funey :D

  • wow, all your friends have a true badge! anyways, I was blog hopping, and I know how you feel, but it doesn’t really bothers me, beside I have friend who I can say TRUE XANGA friends, and it really doesn’t matter if I have many or few, as long as all the friends in my list really cares… :D

  • you are so true about the footprints. i love it when people sub. it’s okay if they don’t comment. because yes, you’re right, sometimes there’s just nothing there to say. when they sub it has deeper meaning. they love the story of your life, and they want more. but sometimes it also doesn’t mean that way, because some people sub after a few exchange of comments, for some reasons like they’ll have quicker access to your site when they need to reply. sometimes they don’t even read your “day.” they comment back on your last comment to them, not exactly about your new post. isn’t that sad?

    xx

  • I tend to communicate with a very small circle of friends, and you Anji, are one of them.

    While I like it that people leave comments on my weblog, I’m not upset if they don’t I don’t.   People are generally very busy these days and it’s often hard to find time to compose a meaningful comment.  I often wrestle with  that myself.

  • I have met several people through friends of friends. That’s how I found you! Love your posts!

  • I don’t use the Friends so much, but I do like to click on other people’s Subs and check out some new blogs that way.  Have found a few new Xanga friends in the process, including one who happens to live 10 minutes from me!  Now if I could just figure out how to change my theme/page…

  • Doesn’t bother me at all it people don’t leave comments. I understand not knowing what to say :)

  • I sub, I don’t friend.  The friends I have, others requested for it.  I put the subs on my “right panel” because I can with premium.  Why bother with friends when you can sub.  That was my motto.  Doesn’t mean you can’t befriend me though.  Now… you still haven’t replied to my last email about differenct sizes of the piece… are you ignoring me? 

  • well said little lady! and 104 eprops!?!?yooooaza other people think the same.

  • comments is what makes Xanga more fun than a personal homepage.

    The whole footprint, subscribers, comments, friends and star sytems – well they can boost your ego, but as easliy totally defleat it.

    we’re all here for different reasons, but the best thing is that most people seem to be here for the sake of expressing their own creativity

  • I would warmly accept any comments, if the comments are of good will. 

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